Ziam, 2025

Global disasters have put the Earth into a worldwide famine. All nations are suffering. Thailand, however, is suffering a bit less so due to an ‘insect farming’ program initiated by a man named Vasu. His next big plan is to provide food for the world with a type of fish untouched by the pollution. Unfortunately, said fish isn’t quite as clean as it is believed, and the consequences are… Anybody? Anybody? That’s right! A quick and painful death followed by cannibalistic zombism.

We meet Singh. He drives (and defends,) a truck delivering those bug-based protein bars across the unsafe countryside, where looters and hijackers apparently run amok. But Singh is a retired Muay Thai kickboxing champion, and seemingly can fend off dozens of men single-handedly. This is not appreciated by Rin, his wife. And not just because she is a doctor at nearby Prachamit Hospital.

It was at this hospital that the first case of, we’ll call it “fish poisoning’ takes place. Rin witnesses the first signs of infection and fairly rapid transformation of a patient. Very quickly, the hospital is overrun with zombies and victims, with the balance shifting rapidly.

Singh hears news of the quarantine at the hospital and scoots into action, defies the quarantine and seeks out Rin, unaware of neither the outbreak of undead, nor the military’s explosive solution to end the spread of the contagion. Action ensues!

    Lots of action.

    Bare-knuckles, martial artsing action! 

Okay! Jumping right into the nuts and bolts of it, the zombies are fast ones. Fast, angry, growlers, true, BUT they 1. Are Dead, 2. Transfer zombism through bites, 3. Seek out and eat the flesh of the living, and 4. Are only stopped by destroying the brain. So, some credit must be awarded for canon. There is a weird transformation to them later in the film, too. Not too sure about that.

The action, though not always zombie-related, is immediate and throughout. Decent gore, and the darkened hospital setting makes for a nice claustrophobic and labyrinthine environment.

As for the cons, the characters, while capably acted, come off as fairly one dimensional and uninteresting. Not overly engaging and I found myself not really caring about their fates.

Then there is the story arc: An outbreak, followed by hero tries to rescue damsel. Et cetera. The entire plot really added nothing new to the genre, and some of the events were quite predictable.

And there is a concept called ‘plot armor,’ where your main protagonist can overcome superior adversity, but in Singh’s case, his near invulnerability borders on ridiculous. I mean, is this guy even human!?!

Lastly, and this might just be me, it wasn’t really scary. Oh sure, it had horror elements and a scary scenario, but no real jolts. No jumps. No dread.

But that’s me nit-picking. Let’s get a more objective rating by holding it up to the Zombie Movie Rubric! And, based solely on that grading system’s criteria, Ziam lands itself a ZMR score of 2.6 out of a possible 4.0. This does earn it a “Worth-a-watch” recommendation, but go in expecting a fun, at times silly, martial arts film within a Zombie outbreak.

Here is the YouTube trailer: ZIAM 

And just a word of caution, if you ever are in Thailand, watch out for those car windows. They shatter like thin ice!

Outside, 2024

  Francis attempts to keep his family safe from the Zombie apocalypse in a rural Philippine town by returning to his childhood home. As he, his wife and two young sons shelter in the remote farm house, some unresolved childhood traumas resurface, and Francis starts to develop some definite 'Jack Torrance’ tendencies.

    As Francis’ obsession with keeping his family ‘safe’ grows, he boards up the old homestead and keeps everyone inside, despite his wife and sons' desire to travel north, to reported safety. Francis sees ulterior motives in their wanting to leave and even exaggerates the frequency and ferocity of the ever-lessening zombie attacks as a way to emotionally manipulate the young and frightened family.

Jack’s, I mean, Francis’, (sorry,) descent into madness is the real antagonist here. The Zombies are more of a justification for his actions. I mean, any external threat could have sufficed - Aliens, Nazis, wild animals. But Zombies were the chosen catalyst, and for that, we all win.

Those “dead ones,” although not exactly athletic, are still no slowpokes. One needs to hustle to stay ahead. But still require the head shot to dispatch, and transmit the zombism through bites. These Zs also exhibit a different and unusual habit: they repeat the word or phrase that they uttered most or last in life. The uttering of these rote vocalizations, devoid of meaning, adds a bit of dimension and individuality to the undead, and reminds us that they were once humans. It’s also creepy as hell.

Acting was fine - convincing and realistic, (amongst both living and deceased,) and special effects were decent, too. The storyline got a little muddled here and there, with some unnecessary family issues arising. Thusly, Outside’s pacing was a bit slow, I’m sure in attempts to create atmosphere, and a sense of claustrophobia. Ringing in at 2 hours and 22 minutes, however, I would have preferred a lot more walking dead encounters. But as I mentioned, Dad’s emotional deterioration was the main threat here, and well, these things take time.

So, although more of a ‘psychological thriller’ than a straight out ‘zombie horror,’ when rated with my Zombie movie Rubric, Outside scored itself a 2.33 points out of a possible 4.0. The lion’s share of points going to the Zombies, with the pacing and runtime easily costing it the most. 2.33 is still an above average score for a Z-flick. This earns it a recommendation, but one with a caveat: Outside is a time commitment. But even still, it’s a nice watch, and a decent entry into the genre!

And of course, the YouTube trailer to convince you, one way or the other!  OUTSIDE.

Wormwood: Road of the Dead, 2014

 

  

    Jumping right into the action with a zombie attack in full effect, we meet a small group of survivors holed up in a garage out in remote Australia. There is no time to get to know our protagonists except through them telling one another how they got there, with the backstories themselves being action packed. One of the men explains how he needs to rescue his sister, and they agree to armor themselves and retrieve a pickup.

The guys ‘Mad Max’-up a Toyota Hilux with tubular steel, a cage in the back, and even a harpoon gun on top. It’s fairly cool. There seems to be an issue with fuel, and through trial, error, and accident, a solution is found, (one that explains why zombies are fast at night and slow during the day!)

So, armored, vehicled, and ready to rumble, they begin their rescue mission. They believe the sister, Brooke, is holed up in a studio/shed under attack by zombies, but in reality, she has been captured by these paramilitary types who are working with a sadistic scientist type who is a right evil bastard.

The two groups encounter one another, and we learn that people with the blood type A- seem to be immune from the virus. The two factions clash. Our boys evade and are pursued. And even more action ensues!

The sister, Brooke, at this point, has revealed a skill of her own. She apparently can control the zombies with her mind to some extent. She attempts to escape captivity and her experimental treatment this way.

    How did she develop this ability? It isn’t really said. Perhaps through the stuff Dr. Evil was giving her? And for how long was this guy doing these things? Didn’t the Z’apocalypse, like, JUST start? 

Don’t over think it. Simply a plot devices. Accept it, and move on. You’ll be able to enjoy the movie that way. Wyrmwood: Road of the Dead is an action film. One with zombies, elements of horror, and humor, sure. But the ‘Action’ section is where this was filed!

The zombies, with the exception of nocturnal sprinting abilities, were for the most part  Romeros. Dead, flesh-eating, contagious, and stopped only by trashing the brain. They did screech like angry animals, though. So, 'mostly Romeros.'

Acting was convincing by both living and dead, and zombie make-up was decent. Characters were believable, and engaging, and for the most part, likable. This last part was unfortunate as Wyrmwood would kill off a character without warning. Sometimes sadly, sometimes humorously. But no one was safe!

I found this to be an enjoyable Zombie movie, and despite the questionable logic, a welcome and refreshing entry into the genre. Held up to the ZMR for a more objective rating and Wyrmwood scored itself a 2.88 points out of a potential 4.0! While this definitely translates to a recommendation, a caveat is needed: The is a certain suspension of logic required now and then. Go into this open-mindedly and you're in for a helluva ride!

YouTube has a few decent vids on it. Here is a trailer: WYRMWOOD: ROAD OF THE DEAD 

Night of the Comet, 1984

 

It’s 11 days until Christmas in Southern California in the mid 1980s, and a comet, not seen in our solar system in 65 million years returns to be visible from Earth. In typical 1984 fashion, ‘Comet Viewing Parties’ are everywhere!

18-yearold Valley Girl/military brat, Regina, decides instead to spend the night with her shallow coworker/boyfriend, Larry, in the projection booth of the theatre where the two work.

In the morning, (after ‘The Night of the Comet,’) Larry goes out looking for someone he illegally rented a film to. Streets are all empty, except for clothes and red dust. Then suddenly, Larry gets attacked. 

Great attention to detail: Look at the fake nails!

Locked out now, Reggie goes out looking for Larry and gets attacked by the same assailant. Reg karates the thing off, and jumps on Larry’s motorbike and heads home, only to find her her pep-squad kid sis completely oblivious to the apocalypse. How could have stopped when the DJ on the radio said nothing and is acting like everything is fine?

So, the two decide to shift their shoulder pads and big hair to the local radio station to find out. Here they meet Hector, and after a gunpoint standoff and a racial slur or two, the sisters team up with the equally fluffy-haired trucker. After they talk things over, (and with a little romantic tension,) Hector decides to go see if his family is still alive. So, with his tight Jordaches and big ol' aviators, he splits, promising to return soon.

Cut to a military bunker of scientists and survivalists. They are working on a method to cure, (or at least slow,) the effects on those who weren’t vaporized by the comet. Scientists argue over treatments, and the wisdom of retrieving other survivors, and eventually reach  a decision to go collect the girls, (who broadcasted their whereabouts over the radio!!!)

The two factions meet up, and the vast differences in their agendas becomes more evident.

Okay. Enough with the synopsis. Lets talk zombies. Well, they are very minimal! Apparently, the Zombism is the end stage of a decaying process. This was contracted by those with only minimal exposure to the comet’s effects, (while those in steel shelters were apparently safe!) The Z’s can talk and think, but they still hunt for the living. They aren't necessarily dead, shambolic, or even contagious! So, the word 'zombie' might not even apply!

A good budget and decent acting manage to buoy the rating on this one, but genuine scares, like the undead, are all too few.

And  WOW! This movie has SUCH an eighties vibe, with its technology, wardrobe, hairstyles, and music! The soundtrack is basically a sampler remix of synth riffs fillers from that era’s action/adventure/ comedies movies like ‘Fletch,’ ‘Gremlins,’ and ‘Beverly Hills Cop.’ You know what I mean, as soon as you hear it, you know.

But I had gone looking for an ‘80s Zombie movie, and this one always comes up in people’s lists, and usually with high ratings and recommendations. I can only assume a lot of this is nostalgia-based. I mean, it was watchable. Not unenjoyable, but I would not have given this one any higher than an average.

But I held it up to the Zombie Movie Rubric to see how it rated objectively. Predictably, budget, acting, and characters lifted this up, where it ran fairly neutral in most categories. In the end, the ZMR rated The Night Of The Comet at a 2.11 of out 4.0 stars. 

I can’t give it an honest recommendation, though. It’s really not much of a horror flick- Devoid of any real blood or gore, light on violence, and only an occasional zombie threat. I mean, it wasn’t terrible, just an almost, but not quite, ’80’s, PG-13, zombie movie.

YouTube’s trailer is probably convincing enough for a fan to watch, or not to watch. Here: THE NIGHT OF THE COMET

Zom 100: Bucket List of the Dead, 2023

    Akiro Tendo is a zombie. Oh, not an ‘undead, flesh-eating’ zombie, but a corporate drone - an over-worked, bullied slave to the company. Once a hope-filled optimist who thought he landed his dream job, a year later he is just another burnt-out cog in the machine who dreads each morning.

And then the Zombie Apocalypse happened. And with his exploitative job gone, no one has ever enjoyed an apocalypse more.

Soon, however, horror, loss, & loneliness grips him and Tendo decides to do what he’s always wanted to do before he joins the undead: Hence, the '100 Things Bucket List.'

And so, Tendo sets out to do the list items: Ride a motorcycle, light off a fireworks display, go shopping without regard for cost, you get it. In doing so, he teams up with an old buddy, and a young woman who simply does not understand his motivation. And they embark on a road trip. A quest to the relative safety and fresh food supply of a famous aquarium. Kinda like Tokyo's equivalent of SeaWorld.

Zom 100’s actually undead zombies are great! Not so much runners, (as that would imply coordination,) but quick, twitchy, white-eyed menaces. They provide some good gore and a coupla’ decent scares. And a new element added: Stand motionless and silent and the Zs can’t detect you - Almost like a T-Rex! Interesting new twist, used effectively!

As far as ‘ZomComs’ go,  Zom 100 an optimistic, fresh take on the whole sub-genre. It’s fun and funny and has its share of scares, mostly. However, there are some SERIOUS hammed-up acting scenes littered throughout, cartoonish villain-types that might as well be wearing “EAT ME” t-shirts, and a good number of plot-holes and raised eyebrows. Still, these are mostly forgivable because the main protagonists are engaging and likable.

And then, well, from the arrival at the aquarium on, things get a bit difficult to watch, and the biggest WTF moment, and utter suspension of reality waddles in. Surprisingly, the film embraces thing new element and really prolongs its screen-time despite its improbability and sheer ridiculosity! (Yeah, I said “ridiculosity!”) 

    The entire third act seemed like it undid a lot of what the first two set up, and left me feeling a bit lukewarm on the film, and a bit frustrated in general.

And then, whatever the hell this thing is.

So, I just left the grading up to the Zombie Movie Rubric to do the dirty deed. Surprisingly, the ZMR served up a 2.33, (out of 4,) stars, which translates to a recommendation to watch.  I, however, NEED to provide a caveat: Extreme silliness does ensue! 

Perhaps I need to addend my rubric.

In short, goofy fun, but definitely not to be taken too seriously. 

Anyways, there is a YouTube Trailer that provides enough spoilers for you to make an informed decision on ‘to see, or not to see.’   

                    ZOM 100: Bucket List Of The Dead