Elijah Wood plays a summer-school substitute teacher who, on his first day, has a student attack and bite a classmate in a rabid fit on the worst Monday ever.
As the virus spreads student to student via both bites and scratches, it becomes known that the transformation to the undead/infected only affects those who have not yet gone through puberty. Very quickly, it is virtually a children versus adults fight to the death in a middle school.
Oh yeah, there’s also a very awkward love triangle/jealousy-thing between first-day sub, Clint, (Wood,) Lucy, a woman with whom Clint to school, (Alison Pill,) and her boyfriend, the over-testosteroned gym teacher, Wade, (Rainn Wilson.) This dynamic makes working together to survive a bit tricky.
The humor stays really dark and the violence level high with vivid attacks, dismembering, and devouring of the faculty, and with the surviving teachers staving in the heads of the schoolchildren with hockey sticks, cymbals, fire extinguishers, and even other kids. So, be prepared for an above average shock factor. Actually, the gore level isn’t all that high, but the opening chicken-processing montage is fairly disgusting. Just power through it.
The zombie children, (zomblings?) seem to be mostly a cross between Russos and Runners in nature, (see Zombie Classification Chart,) - running and playing at recess when no adults are around to eat, and setting traps and displaying some residual intelligence when on the hunt.
Being set on a summer-school school day, the atmosphere is obviously delicate: Bright and cheerful outside, but darkened corridors within, (a zombling cut the power.) Jump scares do come into play, about evenly divided amongst gore and suspense. But with this cast and scenario, this horror/comedy definitely leans toward the comedy, perhaps more so than Zombieland, and even Shawn of the Dead!
Still and all, a big name cast, a great budget, and most importantly, an original idea for this genre all add up well for Cooties. According to the ZMR Rubric, Cooties scored a 3.33 points out of a possible 4. This translates to a highly recommended watch.
Still on the fence? Well, there are many trailers on Youtube to help you decide! COOTIES
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