Pride & Prejudice & Zombies, (2016)

   Few things can make a movie more tolerable like low expectations. The lion’s share of these expectations and preconceived opinions for me stem primarily from Pride and Prejudice and Zombies’ trailers - Looking so much like a ‘Hansel and Gretel,’ (2013) or  ‘Van Helsing,’ (2004) or ‘Brothers Grimm,’ (2005) or any other classically-based story ‘modernized’ for today’s audiences, with hip, and stylish young actors looking cool and engaging in all sorts of parkour-esque moves while glibly dispensing witticisms. 

    Okay, I admit, I have NOT seen any of those films, so it isn’t fair of me to judge, but those are the reasons why I won’t. 

   To my great surprise, however, ‘P&P&Z’ does not play like one of those blatantly anachronistic examples of millennial-targeting cinema. Moreover, it attempts to maintain some sort of an albeit tenuous grasp on Jane Austen’s original storyline, following the five Bennet sisters’ pursuit of an appropriate, socially-mobile, husband before their spinster years of the late twenties.

     The obvious difference in the story is the whole ‘zombie apocalypse’ thing that’s going on. Which, to be honest, has a cool backstory of its own. 

     Through an illustrated narrative, it is revealed that in the alternative reality in which Pride And Prejudice And Zombies is set has been dealing with the zombie virus for close to a century. Structures, fortifications, and general precautions are commonplace as the undead are now a part of life. This provides a nice element in the film with the living discussing the undead in an almost blasé manner, such as the family talking about how to remove zombie blood from marble.

The main cast is so entrenched in the prim and proper Regency Period-styles and mannerisms that the contrast of zombie fighting seems pretty far-fetched. But the story does mention the training of young people in the arts of the East as part of a “proper education,” as a way to blend these skills into the whole period’s mentality.

    I was particularly impressed with the choice of zombie styles in this movie: Russo-style zombies, a la ‘Return of the Living Dead.’ A rarely seen zombie type in films these days, ‘Russos’ (See my Zombie Classification Chart for more on this!) can talk, think and even set traps for the living. They attempt to blend into society for the sole purpose of feeding on people. Heck, they even feast on brains! That last part plays a key role in the film, too, with a small creative departure from the Russo-style.

    Lastly, former-Time Lord Matt Smith absolutely steals every scene he is in. His foppish Parson Collins provides some comic relief without being blatant or cartoonish.

    So, yeah! I enjoyed this entry into the genre, against my expectations! I then held it up to my Zombie Movies Rubric and found it scored an admirable 2.75 out of 4, uh, Stars? Points? Bites? (I should really have a scoring standard in place.) 

    In any case, 2.75 translates to a “definitely worth a rental” recommendation. 

Slightly too hip and stylish music-video-style trailer from the YouTubes: PRIDE & PREJUDICE & ZOMBIES

Aw, heck! Have another:
 PRIDE & PREJUDICE & ZOMBIES

Dead Snow, (2009)

    The premise: A group of young medical students decide to spend their Easter break at the remote cabin of one of theirs. After a day of fun in the snow, a creepy local turns up and tells them of the tragic history of the place and its occupation by the Nazis during WW2, how the townsfolk rose up and slew them in their sleep, killing all but the evil Colonel Herzog, (tip of the hat,) and a few of his men. These escaped into the mountains with all the gold they could carry - never heard from again and presumed dead.

    After their initial encounter with these ‘presumed dead,’ the group wisely decides to flee the area. As they make their way back through the remote countryside, the ever-dwindling group of plucky twenty-somethings find themselves hunted down by the undead platoon. And, armed with a chainsaw, sledge hammer, sickle, and snowmobile, the med students decide to fight back. 

    And, yes. There ARE snowmobile kills!

    The stark beauty of the Norwegian wilderness plays a major role in conveying a sense of isolation and desperation, and makes this film seem like a country-wide haunted house movie!

    These are NOT your standard zombies, either! The ‘Rules of Romero’ do not apply here. Aside from being the reanimated deceased, similarities with your garden-variety walking dead are few. These guys, run, think, take orders from their commander and have a very specific goal: the retrieval of their stolen gold.

    However, it is this original premise, along with a consistency in their purpose that allows these zombies to score some decent points! Combined with likable characters, good acting, nice special effects, and great pacing, Dead Snow scores a whopping 3.5, (out of 4!) on my Z - Rubric. Definitely worth a viewing for a kick-butt, high speed, action/adventure horror romp in the Norwegian woods.

Enjoy a free trailer preview, won’t you? DEAD SNOW

World War Z, (2013)

  Huge production quality is the real draw to this big-budget blockbuster from 2013. And the action kicks off right out of the gate. The breakneck pace is maintained dramatically right up to that point where the initial WTF moment turns to a “We need a plan,” moment, a good twenty minutes in. Then, a little story unfolding, and a bit of character development join the continuing sense of urgency.

  Max Brooks’ book, ‘World War Z,’ was essentially a collection of not-necessarily-related stories from around the world, set during the zombie apocalypse. The movie ‘adaptation,’ more or less simply strung a few of these stories together, tied up with a quest-style plot to find the virus’ origin, and perhaps a cure. Our hero, Brad Pitt’s Gerald Lane, is running an errand for the U.N. by hopping from one sprawling and exotic setting to another, watching the tide turn in the favor of the dead in each locale. South Korea, Israel, Wales: Each step his investigation reveals another piece to the puzzle by revealing more of the zombies weaknesses and origins.

   And right there is one of the major differences I found in World War Z as opposed to many other zombie films, it played out more like a mystery. I mean, Oh sure! There was plenty of horror, (and “Action/Horror," at that,) as well as survival, and guns, and military. Oh, and falling! Lots of falling. Apparently, zombies have no concept of ledges and do not even slow down when coming near them! Zombies were raining from the skies everywhere from Newark to Jerusalem! Ah, but I digress. 

  Yes. All of those good action/horror elements exist here, and in high numbers, but a linear storyline weaves its way through all of those and creates an almost “whodunnit” feel.

   The movie also introduced a new concept in zombie physiology in their search for healthy living hosts for the virus, and not just as eating machines. A small point, but pivotal to the total story.

   And, unlike so many ‘living dead’ films that end with an inevitable gloomy fade out on a dying world, World War Z delivers some small degree of closure in an optimistic final act that had to earn it some points for creativity.

   So, what do we get from a $190,000,000.00 budget? 

(BTW, that is 30,000 times the budget of the same year’s ‘The Battery!’)

   Well, we get an A-List action star lead, we get beautiful exotic sets, some decent SPFX and most of all, we get the promise* of a franchise. 

All of this translates to a big ol’ 3.375 on the Zombie Movie Rubric and a good pile of fun, dropping from ledges all over the world!

Them YouTubes provides a really cool movie trailer here that really imparts the overwhelming and crushingly desperate mood. WORLD WAR Z 

*Sadly, as of right now, WWZ 2 production has been cancelled. But if demand is high enough, who knows what the future will bring?

The Dead, (2010)

   Taking place shortly after the outbreak of walking dead and giving no explanation for it, the film opens with a plane attempting to leave Africa only to crash just offshore. The few survivors to make it to the beach are greeting by slowly advancing corpses shambling out of the jungle.

   The zombies in The Dead are the closest to the Romero-style: slow-moving, silent, expressionless, and unblinking. The darkness of the African countryside at night only amplifies their creepiness. It is due to this that I feel The Dead could fit easily among the original trio of Romero films, possibly as a sort of parallel sequel. 

   It has been critiqued by some as being a bit slow, and at times, the development of the story does keep the deceased at bay, but it is important to remember that this is not of the "action-horror," sub-genre of zombie movies, but an old-school, straight-up monster movie. 

   One of my personal faves, and holder of a ZMR score of 3.62 out of 4.0! 

   2013 saw an equally great sequel from the Ford Brothers, set in India and called, not surprisingly, The Dead 2.

Grab a peek at it on them YouTubes right here: THE DEAD 

Maggie, (2015)

   There is a scene in most zombie films where a main character is bitten. He/she knows they are going to die and so does all of his/her family and/or friends. Now imagine taking this scene and making a full-length feature film out of it. Put off by the idea? Well, maybe that is how a big-budget, major-name cast, modern zombie movie like Maggie stayed off of the collective radar of the Z-Nation.* 

(*Zombie movie buffs NOT the Syfy Network show.)

   Here is the synopsis: It’s a few months after the outbreak of the Necroambulis Virus Epidemic and containment is in the grasp of the survivors. The government is working, police, hospitals, CDC, newspapers, radio, et cetera. Heck, the schools are getting ready to reopen. 

   The Zombie Virus in Maggie, (uh, the movie,) takes anywhere between six to eight weeks from infection until “the turn,” (where it kills you and you attack and eat the living,) but the quarantine procedures are quite liberal, allowing you to take your infected loved ones home with you up until they reach a certain point where the end symptoms show when they must be brought in for official quarantine for their final days.

   Meanwhile, out in rural Anytown, USA, the virus has infected daughter Maggie, (played by Abigail Breslin, in her SECOND major zombie movie role - Second of THREE now, that is! Look out, Danny Trejo!) 

   Dad brings her home to the farm until she must be surrendered. Her doctor, recording her progress suggests 3 options to Arnie: 1) Go to quarantine, 2) Administer the same quarantine 'cocktail’ at home so she stays home for her remaining days, but informs him that the process is reportedly VERY painful, or 3) Make it quick.

And the rest of the movie is one long, drawn-out goodbye.

   Zombie movies typically fall into one of three categories: 

1) Horror. I mean straight-up horror movies like Night of the Living Dead. 

2) Action-Horror. This is like Dawn of the Dead, World War Z, et cetera. Guns, explosions, Yeah! Or - 

3) Zombie-Comedies, (or “Zomedies”) which, with the exception of, like 4 of them, tend to suck. 

Maggie, however, is different. Maggie is a drama - loaded with tension and emotion, with only an occasional scare to remind you that it is a zombie film.

   Yes, this is kind've like the 'Lifetime Channel' zombie movie. But it also opens up a new zombie sub-genre, with drama-zombies, (Drambie?) It does NOT have enough living dead encounters for me. I prefer zombie movies to be scary, not just sad. That said, The Zombie Movie Rubric, a tool for objective grading of films devoid of personal preference, once again differs from my opinion and gave Maggie a 3.125. Big budget, good actors, original story. Go figure!

   So, personally, my advice is, if you want to see an big-name, action-movie star against a horde of the undead in an ACTION zombie flick, check out Dolph Lundgren in Battle of the Damned. 

   But if you are looking for something different within the zombie genre, check out Maggie. But be forewarned! It is a sad, SAD film.

Here is the trailer on YouTube - MAGGIE

King of the Zombies, (1941)

   A plane carrying a U.S. government agent, his valet and a pilot crashlands on a remote island on the way to the Bahamas. Here they find, Dr. Sangre, a Lugosi-esque mad scientist-type who just happens to have a mansion infested with the living dead. 

At midnight, they are said to attack the living.

    Originally set to be a straight horror film, production changes were made to make it more comedic following the success of Bob Hope's Ghostbreakers the year before. Monogram Pictures cinched it so by bringing in their leading bug-eyed funnyman, Mantan Moreland. 

   Laughs outnumber the scares in this mystery flick with elements of Dracula, King Kong, Abbott & Costello, and Scooby-Doo, (especially in the wrap-up,) so this may well be the very first "Zom-Com!"

   The zombies are of the voodoo variety and, sadly, onscreen for too-brief amount of time, and provide minimal threat when they are.

  The ZMR gave it a 2.5 rating but doesn't take its dated nature into consideration.

  This is less for zombie movie fans than it is for classic movie buffs, and Mantan Moreland not only steals every scene he is in, but the whole damned movie!

Here is the movie trailer: KING OF THE ZOMBIES

I am sure that the whole film is also available on YouTube if you like what you see!

Zombie (1979)

Also known as Zombie Flesh Eaters. What a great name!

   Many people have trashed this movie calling it garbage, or mindless gore. Me? I call it brilliant! (But I have such a weakness for the Italian zombie features!)

  

   Lucio Fulci released this movie originally as Zombie 2, because Dawn of the Dead was released in Italy as Zombi and he wanted to make it an unofficial sequel. As such, it really scratches the itch of the whole Romero-style zombie-films. It sticks to the canon of the Romero 'Dead' movies, but with one notable variation: Fulci's zombies are not limited to the recently dead. He sees no conflict with reanimating conquistador corpses. 

   The movie starts with a great opening scene of an abandoned yacht drifting into New York Harbor and a huge zombie attacks the investigating police officers. The owner of the boat missing, his daughter launches a search to his last known whereabouts, a tropical Caribbean island called Matul. And there is the set-up. Obviously, the island is overrun.

    Fulci has also perfected the much-copied emerging from the grave scene, with particular emphasis of the writhing worms. Man, he loved them writhing worms. Yes, this is a flat-out gore movie, with one of the most cringe-inducing eye-gouge scenes ever filmed. 

    Also, it has the so-awesome-it-has-never-been-done-before-or-since zombie vs. shark scene. So suck it, critics!

   It is important to note that this is NOT the action-zombie, shoot 'em up of the Ving Rhames/Danny Trejo variety. It is a horror movie more in line with Night of the Living Dead than of Dawn of the Dead.

The ol' ZMR gives it a respectable score of 3.125, (out of 4.0,) but only because it doesn't have a heart. 

Me? I would go a bit higher. 

This, to me, could be filed under 'essential viewing.'

 Convinced yet? Okay, here is a YouTube trailer to sell you!
 ZOMBIE

 Ah, heck, have another!
 ZOMBIE

(And, you didn't hear it from me, but I believe the film in its entirety can be found somewhere on YouTube, as well!)

Osombie, (2012)

    Believing Osama bin Laden is still alive, a man heads to Afghanistan to finish him off. Shortly thereafter, his yoga-instructor sister goes looking for him only to discover that Afghanistan is overrun with the walking dead. A U.S. Army platoon is also engaged in the assorted scuffles, sent to rescue these siblings amidst the zombie infestation.

   Still there? Okay, good. After writing out that premise, I was sure no one was still reading.

   Yeah, this flick has some flaws. It boasts the typical army stereotypes: the gung-ho warrior, a Full Metal Joker-type, even a katana wielding woman with a mysterious past!  

   Also, that not-so-subtle portmanteau of 'zombie' and 'Osama' for a title kind of robs any surprise from the "surprise twist," (this is not Shyamalan!) But in fairness, the acting wasn't that bad, the zombies were cool, it had a neat, exotic-looking setting and even a subplot or two to make Osombie a goofy, fun action flick with some horror elements.

I tossed it up at the Zombie Movie Rubric and it lit up a surprisingly decent 1.88 out of 4.0 points.

Official movie trailer on the them YouTubes here: OSOMBIE

Dead Meat, (2005)

       

     One fine evening, I found myself in the mood for a nice low-budget zombie movie from the ol’ Emerald Isle. Dead Meat, (the DVD case reads “Fangoria’s Gorezone - Dead Meat”,) turned out to be exactly what I was looking for. 

      So, after an accident on a very lonely road in rural Leitrim, Ireland, a pair of visiting tourists, Helena and Martin, attempt to move the body of the man they hit with their car to a nearby cottage for help. Things go from bad to worse and soon, Helena is alone in a foreign land surrounded by the undead, and the even more foreign living.

      What plays out is your standard outbreak scenario: Run, find a stronghold, make a stand. Nothing wildly different or original there. But it is the casts of locals that make this film stand out. Helena meets up with the local gravedigger, Desmond, who despite her lack of interest in the matter, attempts to tell the histories of places as the are chased through them. And then there is Coach Cathal Cheunt, a crotchety, and foul-mouthed hurling enthusiast and his equally untrusting missus, (and living dead look-alike,) Francie.  They make their way across the Irish countryside as night falls, hoping to get out of the infected area fending off attacks by both undead humans and livestock.

      Oh yes. That is how this particular outbreak began: A virulent strain of Mad Cow disease that had cattle attacking humans, thereby spreading the infection.

       And zombie cows aren’t the only departure from your typical Romero-esque ghouls, either. Dead Meat also sees the deceased using weapons to kill, (but only if readily available, a pickaxe, assorted blunt objects, nothing too sophisticated.)

      A sleeping state is seen, too, where the dead are in a type of dormant rest, though not for too long, standing and eyes rolled back. Creepy to navigate through in the darkness of night.  And dispatching the infected is no longer limited to damaging the brain, (though that still seems the most effective way.) A variety of stabbings, hackings and sports-related injuries can put them at rest as well. This must have been born of the desire to showcase unique splattering exterminations.

       Other hallmarks of traditional Zombism still apply: Attack and feast on the living, infection through bites, and slow, shambolic movements. These all combine to make the dead in Dead Meat a nice, slowly overwhelming menace, despite some bad make-up. I mean, some really terrible zombie make-up. The movie has some really decent effects in zombie kills and gore/wounds, so surely some better facial work could have been done!

      After all is said and killed, however, I enjoyed this movie a lot. No, there is no cinematic history being made, not even a real departure from run-of-the-mill zombie movies, but the characters are interesting and likable, the story, minimal as it was, was a nice, linear arc with a straight ahead goal and no attempts at surprise twists. The zombies, despite the aforementioned crap make-up, were a creepy threat and conveyed that sense of danger. 

       If you are looking for a Living Dead movie, yet another story of how a zombie outbreak would play out and you’d like to see it with quirky Irish flavor to it, you should definitely check out Dead Meat.

       On the ZMR scoring rubric, Dead Meat earned itself a 2.66 out of a possible 4.0 points, (buoyed on the strength of its characters and some nice smooth pacing,) but I personally enjoyed it more that that number reflects.

       One serious caveat, though. Definitely watch this with the subtitles on. Although these folks are technically speaking the English language, the deep rural Irish accent makes many of the lightening-fast comments and assorted expletives barely recognizable. And a lot of the charm I found in this movie was due to these off-the-cuff comments and under the breath lines.

This YouTube trailer simply doesn’t do it justice. 

      DEAD MEAT