Corpse Eaters, (1974)

Alleging to be “Canada’s first gore movie,” this forgotten nugget of celluloid has a history all its own: Made in 1974 by a drive-in theatre owner to show at his drive-in, he soon sold it for $5k to Hollywood where it was shelved for 20 years, only to be found, and released in the zombie-movie-saturated 1990s by Encore Home Videos.

The movie's plot, however, is far more confusing and somewhat less interesting: Two young Canadian couples are looking for something different to do on a Friday the 13th, (instead of the same ol’ ‘go to a rock show in Bakersfield!') One of the men suggest spending the night in a graveyard, and after drawing straws, off they go.

Once there, the other guy remembers (perfectly, mind you!) some Satanic incantation and the next thing you know, (mistake number two!) they are holding hands in a circle and calling out for Satan. Such fun, eh, kids!

One thing leads to another, as 'one things' often do, (albeit after a very long, drawn-out time,) and soon, the living are being eaten by the dead. This film is yet another very early example of Romero’s ‘Living Dead’ rules: Slow and shambling dead, attack and eat the living, and the bitten become reanimated. This is a VERY low budget affair, however, and should be taken with precaution.

And speaking of precautions, before the film begins a disclaimer about the gory scenes states that an alarm accompanying a retching man in a green suit will appear just before the more disturbing scenes, and viewers with weaker tolerances should look away from the screen. I kid you not. It happens. (Check it out!)

So, the Pros and Cons of Corpse Eaters are as follows.

Pro #1: The 'dead' look pretty good for 1974. They do moan slightly, possibly gasses escaping their systems, but the make-up is above passable, dusty and grey, covered in dirt and cobwebs and moving slowly and unsteady.

Pro #2: The rising from the graves scene is among the best climbing out of graves scenes. It really coveys the effort of digging ones way through rotten coffin-tops and six feet of damp soil. I enjoyed this scene.

Pro #3: The whole thing has a great B-movie feel to it. One can imagine this at a drive-in theatre.

Pro #4: it is only 57 minutes long.

Now for the Cons.

Con #1 is so blatant that it could alone sink this tug. The pacing is so slow and uneven. 25 out of its 57 minutes nothing is going on except bad acting, (Con #2,) and really bad, illogical decision-making, (Con #3.) 

The movie had a chance to tie its opening scenes together with the party of four, for a really nice loop, but it just didn’t capitalize on it, instead opting for (Con #4,) a really abrupt, ham-handed ending that left too many things unfinished, (I am guessing the funding ran out.)

On the Grading Rubric Corpse Eaters scored a 1.875 - with those points going mostly to the Dead. Plot, characters, originality, and pacing all just dragged this low-budgeter down. 

But, HEY! Don’t believe me. It is available to watch online for free right here. ☞ 'CORPSE EATERS'

I mean, its only 57 minutes.

"An orgy of cannibalism drenched in blood color!"